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1.
Jerome 04:54
i’m fixing this window for a second time no recipe, no rolling pin charging out a dollar an hour wiping clean the scene of the crime there are no strings, no place to stay scratching round like some piece of good news all my prayers wearing thin it’s a homeless, stringless kind of day y’know democracy is upside down inside out & wrong way round that billboard i voted in is now running people like me out of town so we go to sleep at the astrodome drape ourselves in a cardboard blanket if by some mistake we make it through i’m changing my name to jerome calm & angry all at once my friend the prez finally shows up gonna hug him bad & kiss his ears if he pulls another one of these stunts & he’s not at work cos he got the flu he’s getting old, turning grey you’re ill & old & late i suppose don’t complain, eat your food
2.
Big Guy 04:14
i ain’t the big guy living at the top be moving to a penthouse before the penny’s gonna drop you been borned you been warned your eyes are crying from seeing too much musta bitten into something you were told not to touch you been borned you been warned everything is simple not thinking too hard looks like the sun going down from the chair in this yard there’s no explaining butter wouldn’t melt in a far distant future you can explain it for yourself you we’re borned you been warned crazy as a pencil madder than an axe you drawn the corner now hack your way out of that you been borned you been warned stars twinkling so hard don’t understand it at all maybe they just came on that way before the fall thing’s are gonna work out there’s nothing we can do ‘cept maybe check your ears are on in case you got a warning too i ain’t the big guy living at the top be moving to a penthouse before the penny’s gonna drop you been borned you been warned
3.
Near You 03:03
i heard somebody went to live in your town so i could be near you pine got so old it fell right down so i could be near you sun came up over the hill so i could be near you heard of some place, he’s going there still so i could be near you fish took the hook & he ran with that line so i could be near you telephone’s dead, the fire’s alive so i could be near you a schoolboy whistled to a passing cloud so i could be near you y’couldn’t hear nothing, it rained so loud so i could be near you well i took a wrong turn & i got waylaid so i could be near you whole of my life, it’s been that way so i could be near you now i’m lying down, don’t ask me why so i could be near you stars come out, i close my eyes so i can be near you
4.
Wedding Hat 03:12
think i’ll fix myself a plate of peas say a grace down on my knees pick myself up off the floor take a fork from the drawer find a chair to sit upon then i’ll put my wedding hat on say, this weather’s turning black a crazy wind, shutters flap cats & dogs be creeping indoors thunder & lightning, reverse applause but all these clouds will soon be gone when i put my wedding hat on & maybe you is somebody else jumped the tracks just to escape from yourself well maybe you aint & maybe you is like some hundred dollar question in a tv quiz you say your name is jan, can i call you yvonne when i put my wedding hat on?

about

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released September 9, 2016

all songs TJ Heraud except where noted

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Not The Merkins New Zealand

Not The Merkins are Rewi McLay (slide, el. guitar, vocals), Dorland Bray (el. guitar, banjo, vocals), Joss Colling (bass, vocals),Tim Heraud (vocals, ac. guitar), & Kerry Fraser (drums, vocals).
The Merkins, on the other hand, are as much not Not The Merkins as Not The Merkins are not The Merkins, except for an FX box, a couple of leads & (well ok) maybe a singer they share in common.
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